See, I have a weird attitude towards Valentine's day. On one hand it is very commercialised, and I find that it spreads more sorrow than happiness because it promotes being in love - leaving the unloved feeling depressed; and on the other hand, I always end up hoping that this will be the year I get a valentine.
But like all things, if you don't get out there, what can you expect. I would send Alex a valentine each year, one year it was an anonymous one - because I didn't want to be credited with it.
Now, I don't really have anyone to send a valentine's to. Well, that's not entirely true - but I haven't got anyone I'd be willing to send a valentine's to, because there isn't anyone who I would consider an appropriate person for it.
Did that make sense? Sounds like I'm bad mouthing friends now - but let's face it, not many of the people I know would want a valentines from me. Not putting myself down, just avoiding awkwardness and stuff like that.
I think I'll shut up about that now... :D
Anyway, in seriousness, what does Valentine's actually mean to you?
I guess to me it is two things - it's a chance to tell someone you care about that you actually care about them, and it's a chance for those of us in relationships to celebrate having found that person we love.
We don't really need to buy gifts to do this either. Sure, we ought to be able to do that any time of the year, but Valentine's kind of gives us a nice excuse to actually do what we normally feel a little too shy to do. Remember, a lot of Valentines are sent anonymously - the idea of sending your love rather than expecting anything in return. In the commercialisation of the day we have kind of forgotten that.
Still, I can see the problem with getting anonymous valentines. Like, thinking about who the hell sent you one and how you would rather they came and took you out on a date because you've been single for freaking ever and ... *ahem*
You get the idea. ;)
In the meantime, I don't appear to have gotten the EB job. So, yeah, stressed and disappointed. I have four days to avoid losing my overdraft facility by getting a signed contract... not going to happen. I don't know how I'm going to keep paying the rent either...
I can only hope that one of the jobs I've applied for actually comes through with an interview, or the other opportunity I applied for actually lands me a job.
Otherwise, I'm clean out of ideas. :( It's not that I'm too proud to work in a restaurant or such like - but rather that I can't afford to be tied up in a job that wont be paying enough to cover my expenses.
Anyway, start planning your own valentines, people. Bring a little love to each other this week. :)
Love and Huggles
Conan
Currently Reading: Army of Darkness RPG
Currently Playing: Fireborn - Rememberance; Unknown Armies - To Go
Mood: Switching between okay and worried
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