That's hit harder than I thought it would. I guess the whole thing of being pressured out of my job ahead of time, that I'm still without furniture because of my family's notorious behaviour, that I'm still not feeling settled and generally stressed about money and debts... it's just left me in free fall.
For the briefest moment I was caught with the idea of just running back to Auckland and trying to restore my old life. But that isn't going to happen. I'm not going to give in.
However, now I need to make some serious decisions. I can go on to do the Psychology degree that I was toying with - and that seems like a smart move.
In the meantime, I'll apply for a creative New Zealand grant, chase other avenues and get published anyway. Then I will be going back to the selectors for this course and I will make them eat that rejection. :D
I'm not really sure how I'm feeling at the moment... I feel kind of empty, and tense.
I would just like something to go right for a change...
Love and Huggles
Conan
Currently Watching: Buffy Season 6, Disc 1
Mood: Disappointed, very tired
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