When things start mounting up...

So I had a pretty awful week this week. A series of deliveries of bad news has put a dampner on my dreams and hopes. A lot of it has to do with just really unfortunate and sad things happening to people I know, and just mounting pressure that I'm putting on myself in the desire to try and figure out what I want my future to be.

Put simply, I want to find that someone who I can share my life with. It has come back with a vengence the last couple of days. I also want to run my own gaming business and I want to write. I want to be able to afford to be a writer full time.

But I can't write at the moment. Nothing ever meets my vague standards. So I need to somehow get over that hump.

Today was a horrible day at work - everyone was in a grumpy and foul mood. Usually I brighten the place up with my chipper and cheerful demeanour. But because I was also in a foul mood, I was having a hard time being any more of a help than anyone else.

E. was so concerned he even stopped and hugged me twice in an attempt to cheer me up! Which of course was kind of odd and really made me more confused than cheerful.

Thankfully VUWGC was a god send tonight with Mike's "The Repo Men" scenario. We had a blast, and it has helped to end the night on a really positive note. Luke's UA game last night did the same - so I'm in a good mood now.

Just wish I could fall in love with someone. Again with the single thing... but it is such a clear and present concern for me.

Seriously though - who would be the right kind of person for a guy like me?

Love and Huggles

Conan

Currently Reading: Castle Falkenstein; Shadows of Asia
Currently Playing: Unknown Armies - To Go;Exalted
Mood: Tired but okay...